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By Courtney Clark
It’s hard not to feel beaten down and hopeless when you see the daily news, no matter your political affiliation or personal beliefs. When the world seems like it’s too much to handle, it may be because your brain is tricking you into one of the following overwhelming mental traps: I’m only one person, I can’t do anything to help. The world’s problems are bigger than any one person can solve. And when we look at them in one giant mass, like on the front page of a news website, it’s easy to feel completely powerless. But the next time you catch your brain saying “I can’t do anything to help,” correct it. Tell your brain, “No. You can’t do everything to help. But there is something.” Do you have specialized skills that are needed? Can you donate money? Can you educate yourself and be a resource for others? If there’s nothing you can do today, think long-term. Can you teach your children to end the cycle? Can you consider a run for public office? When we feel hopeless, that feeling can start to spiral and invade other areas of our lives. But the good news is it’s easy to correct by taking action in a single area. Decide one thing you can do to make the world what you think it should be, and that hopeless feeling will start to fade. As it does, you’ll feel yourself able to take on more and more. But if I turn off the TV, I’m just turning a blind eye. I applaud anyone who thinks “Sure, I could turn off the TV or shut down the computer and not have to look at it. But the people living in X situation don’t have the privilege of walking away.” That’s a compassionate thought. But my concern is this: engaging in a solution is activism. Engaging in a solution is positive. Engrossing yourself in a problem is mental torture. Activism is literally the foundation of the United States of America, but recently I’ve heard many people say they can’t sleep or even talk to other people because they’re so outraged over the current state of affairs. If you are so disturbed by current events that you can’t function, you may be unable to turn your feelings into positive outcomes. Stepping away from the news, if it puts you in a better mental state to take action on your beliefs, is the best help you can offer. I don’t even know what to believe. Social media has become a major source of many people’s information. Yet nearly every time I log on to Facebook, I see someone sharing something that appears (on the surface) to be research, but at closer look it’s not. My recommendation, if you’re overwhelmed with conflicting information is to get off social media, or at least don’t get your information from there, even if an article appears to be legit and it agrees with your beliefs. Do your own research. If you’re looking to find balanced media sources, I’ve seen this infographic floating around. I also just ran across this online self-test to help you identify whether or not you can tell the difference between facts and opinions (this is a non-partisan quiz!). In complex situations, there often isn’t one single, magic-wand of a solution, and therefore not one entirely right answer. If the flood of conflicting opinions on social media is making you want to scream, it’s okay to log off. Engage, but engage where it really matters (which often isn’t the internet.) As the world becomes smaller and smaller thanks to the speed of digital information, it’s easier than ever to see the suffering and the conflict. You cannot fix the problems of the world unless you are as strong and resilient as possible. Avoid the overwhelm, then you can be a champion for the causes you believe in. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success!
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By Courtney Clark
If you’re planning to make some new year’s resolutions this week, you probably expect to stick to them. Resolutions can be motivating and help you reach your goals. But there’s one big mistake I’ve seen lots of people make when it comes to setting new year’s resolutions, and it means your resolution is definitely going to fail. You Don’t Become Someone Else On January 1st One of my dear friends loves picking up new hobbies. Every year or so she learns another skills or takes up a hobby with plans to become a master. One year, she set her sights on yoga. “I’ve been so stressed,” she said. “I’ve done some yoga, and it makes me feel more peaceful. I think I should take yoga teacher training and become a full-time yogi. If I did that, then I’ll be able to live a more peaceful life.” I call it the Fairy Godmother Fantasy – the hope that you could wave a magic wand and turn into someone else. Often when we set our new year’s resolutions, we’re really wishing we could just become someone else. If I could just lose the weight, then I would be a healthy person. If I could just finish my degree, then I would be a confident person. If your new years resolution doesn’t bear any resemblance to who you are right now, it’s not a good resolution. It’s probably going to leave you frustrated. If Cancer Can’t Do It, New Year’s Day Can’t, Either I thought cancer might make me a different person. But it didn’t. Neither did a brain aneurysm. I have a greater appreciation for life, sure. But I’m still the same person I was before. If I’M still the same person at my core, even after writing my own funeral service and sealing it in an envelope in my bedside table, just in case, then the calendar turning over to January 1st isn’t probably going to magically make you a different person, either. And in reality, it shouldn’t. In many of the conversations I’ve had with my friends in the cancer world, we’ve talked a lot about whether cancer has changed us. Even my friends who found out their cancer was terminal reported that the news didn’t completely change who they were. My friend Becky said it best: “Heck, I’m already getting a lot less time than I wanted, to be me on this planet. Why would I want to stop being me any sooner than I have to?” “You-but-better” is a cliché you’re probably sick of hearing. Sadly, you-but-better is probably the right path forward. You can’t wave a magic wand and become a different person on January 1st. You can’t immediately become a more peaceful person just by taking up yoga. You can’t become a naturally healthy person by dropping a few pounds or quitting smoking. You can change your habits, but no habit-change will make your life completely different. By setting realistic expectations, you’ll save yourself a lot of frustration come April. This January 1st, listen to Becky. Don’t spend your time on this planet trying to be someone else. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Courtney Clark
There’s nothing really wrong. Things are mostly going pretty well. So why can’t you just… be happy? Seriously, it’s not that hard. Except… it is. Just “being happy” turns out to be a lot more complicated than it sounds. For starters, some people’s brains just don’t naturally cooperate with society’s expectations of happiness, because of depression or anxiety. For other people, we anticipate we’ll be happy when we reach a certain goal, or have a certain experience, but it doesn’t happen automatically. Admit It: The Holidays Sometimes Stink For a perfect example, just look at the holidays. This time of year, we’re expected to be happy. We should either be basking peacefully in the glow of the reason for the season, or bouncing joyfully between friends and parties and glitter-covered wrapping paper. But what we get instead is stress, overwhelm, and disappointment. See, expectations of happiness often ruin actual happiness. If we feel like happiness is REQUIRED, or else we must be broken, we put so much pressure on ourselves that happiness becomes nearly impossible. Who can be happy on demand? Probably not you. Who Needs Happiness, Anyway? In fact, studies have shown that the things that make us ACTUALLY happy are pretty hard to predict. Happiness doesn’t always come from the things we think it comes from, because a greater sense of overall joy in life comes from feelings like “meaning” and “significance.” Happiness and meaning are similar, but different, according to research out of Stanford. If you’re looking for happiness that’s longer-lasting, go for meaning, not contentedness. But I Just Want A Little Joy Just because it’s not so easy, that doesn’t mean you should give up on being happy. It just means you won’t find it in any of the presents under the Christmas tree. For a deeper, longer-lasting happy, try these strategies:
Don’t let happiness and the actions that bring true happiness end up buried at the bottom of your to do list in your busy life. Find what matters most and bring some meaning to your days. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! |
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