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By Vicki Hess
Did you ever do something and then wish you had made a different choice? Recently, a friend invited me to join her for lunch at a nice restaurant near my home. I was excited to see her and have a nice meal. It turned out that we could order from the menu or have the buffet brunch. Everyone in our group was having the buffet, so against my better judgment, I chose that too. It went downhill from there. You probably already know the end of this story. It involves an upset stomach from over-eating and a “food coma." Now you might be thinking this sounds like a “first-world problem” and indeed it is. But afterward, I was asking myself… “Why didn’t I make a different choice?” It was a great reminder that I have the power to influence a lot of what happens in my life. And the good news is that you do too! When things happen around us at work, it’s easy to feel like a victim of circumstances. It’s easy to blame others and forget that we can choose the actions we take in response to those things. For example, have you ever said, “She made me so mad” or “He ruined my day”? Maybe you hung onto the anger or frustration and took it out on others throughout the course of your day. This is the equivalent of me making bad choices at the buffet and then complaining about it afterward (metaphorically speaking of course). Feeling angry or frustrated is going to happen. The choice comes in what you decide to do next. Once you are more aware that you can select your response to the emotions you experience, you are back in the driver’s seat. You’ve got the power to make a different – more beneficial – choice. Since it’s November, the month we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the U.S., this is a great time to swap the negative actions that can occur with gratitude. Yes, you read that right. Next time you feel an emotion that you don’t find helpful driving stressful actions, stop and think about what you are grateful for. This isn’t just a soft and squishy idea. It’s research-based. According to The Neuroscience of Gratitude and How It Affects Anxiety & Grief, “commitment to daily gratitude practice reduces an array of negative emotions and is a natural stress detox for the mind and body.” Next time something happens that you don’t like – before you take unproductive actions – remember to take a deep breath and think of one thing that you are thankful for…and then think of another and so on. The knee-jerk choice isn’t always the best one. In the future, I’ll order off the menu or exhibit a little more self-control at the buffet and then I will feel better in the long run. Planning your virtual event? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today book your healthcare speaker and make your next event a success!
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By Vicki Hess
When was the last time you had to do something new at work? It can be a scary proposition. You don’t want to look silly or take too long to complete a task or make mistakes. Being a novice at something can be unsettling. I feel your pain. Recently I decided to join a masters swim program and got back in the pool for the first time in a long time. For those of you who aren’t familiar, a masters swim program is organized swimming that provides coaching and instruction. Since I’ve been doing a few triathlons this seemed to be a great way to bring a new form of exercise into my routine as well as a nice way to meet some people. The first morning that I got to the pool I felt a little anxiety. I thought to myself “What’s going on here? This is just exercise. Why are you worried about this?” Well, it’s because, at my core, I am someone who wants to do well, and I am someone who wants to look like I know what I’m doing. Do you ever feel that way? Here are several ideas for how to take the pain out of doing something new... 1. Look at your own beliefs about the new project that you’re embarking on. That first day back, I stopped myself from worrying and took a deep breath. I reminded myself that this was a choice I had made and was something I wanted to do. Quite often at work we put ourselves in a position where we ask for a new assignment because we’re bored and we want to challenge and then when it actually happens we think “Oh my gosh what was I doing?” Stop take a deep breath examine your own beliefs and look at how you can change those beliefs to be more affirmative. 2. Create intentional vocabulary around this new project. If you hear yourself starting to complain or lament about your fears and worries stop and take a deep breath. Do you see the pattern here? Re-imagine how you could talk about this experience. Instead of saying “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I have to learn this new technology” or “I hate it when things change” or “I am drowning in new work”, reframe things to be more positive. Even though it makes me a little anxious, I decided at the pool that every person I met I wasn’t going to focus on how little I knew. I decided to think about my past experiences and how successful I have been. 3. Embrace your vulnerability mindset. Recognize that this is a new activity. It’s OK to make mistakes. I love it when I realize that I don’t have to be perfect. Being vulnerable and adding courage to that gives you the opportunity to experience vulnerability and joy when you overcome the initial uncertainty and start to master the new skill. 4. Get in the (metaphorical) pool. Stop talking. Stop lollygagging. Stop putting it off. Start the project. Whether it’s learning some new software program or communicating with a whole new team of people or maybe learning a project improvement process, it’s time to dive in and take the plunge! 5. Evaluate how you’re doing. Stop and take a look at your progress. Now is the time to ask for feedback from others. There are coaches at the master swim program and I frequently I ask for suggestions on how I could improve my stroke. I thought I was a pretty good swimmer, but I learned a couple of things on the first day that really changed the level of energy I had to exert and the distance that I could achieve. Evaluate how you’re doing and ask others for help. Be sure to listen when they give you the feedback. Just listen and let it wash over you. 6. Celebrate your successes! They might be very tiny successes in the beginning. For me, mastering my flip turn gave me more momentum as I was pushing off from the side of the pool. I was still slow when I was swimming, but I have improved in one area. Work on the challenges and keep pushing forward. That might mean extra reading, listening or observing others. Celebrate your successes. Pat yourself on the back and celebrate! 7. Repeat the above steps. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
How is your summer going? It’s time to get out your sunglasses and flip flops! If you’re like most people I know, you would probably enjoy having the summer off. I’m pretty sure that isn’t going to happen for most of us, so I was thinking about the next best thing. What if we changed the way we looked at things to create more Joy at work? This summer, I’m going to focus on 3 ways to grow WOWs at work. As a reminder, a WOW is something that makes you feel satisfied, energized and productive; otherwise known as "engaged." Today, I'm sharing another idea to bring a little summertime Joy to work. This month’s tip is to Embody Gratitude! Gratitude is the state of being thankful. This is an internal WOW that you can grow without any formal education, training or skills. Like most things, being grateful needs to be practiced regularly to show any benefit. To make this practice one you think about regularly, try using a Gratitude Trigger™. A Gratitude Trigger is when something you do routinely reminds you to be thankful. At our house, we put our forks together and say 5 things we are grateful for at every meal. Sitting down to eat is the trigger. It’s become such a habit that I even do this when I’m eating alone! You can use events at work as a trigger as well. Here are a few that I’ve heard from folks:
The benefits of gratitude are many. Today is the day to start! Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
Do you remember having summers off? I was talking with friends about summer camp and how much fun it was to play at our neighborhood pool and run around with friends. Being off of school gave us that needed break from studying and responsibility. If only we all had the summer off from work! I’m pretty sure that isn’t going to happen for most of us, so I was thinking about the next best thing. What if we changed the way we looked at things to create more Joy at work? These past few months have been full and uncertain. As I talk to clients, I hear more and more about the desire to find joy in work. It seems many people are struggling with increased workloads, ever-changing priorities and a do-more-with-less mentality. A WOW is something that makes you feel satisfied, energized productive. AKA - engaged! This month’s WOW tip is to Spread Appreciation! The cool thing about appreciation is that it’s a WOW for the giver and the receiver. Each time you appreciate someone that you work with, you get to experience the good feeling that comes with saying “thank you.” When you’re on the receiving end and someone appreciates you, then you get to “feel the love” and understand the value of the work that you do. It’s that simple. Start to spread appreciation to your peers, your boss, your family and friends. This WOW is a great way to lighten up and enjoy the people that you spend time with. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
Have you listened to how folks describe their day-to-day lives at work? Here are some of the words and phrases I regularly hear:
So you may be thinking…”But that’s how I feel, Vicki!” Unfortunately, talking about negative feelings can promote more negative feelings. According to an article in Well+Good, “the words you speak and think can automatically trigger a biological response in your body that increases your edginess exponentially.” The article goes on to say, “It may sound woo woo, but biology backs up the belief that stress ultimately starts when you say that you’re stressed.” Your body responds to thoughts and emotions that are happening in your brain. When you consistently talk about being crazy busy, overwhelmed or in over your head then your body responds by releasing catecholamines (the fight or flight hormone). These hormones start to reinforce the idea that you are in danger. Intentionally choosing your vocabulary positively influences the way you feel and the actions you take. When someone asks about your day, try saying “I’ve always got plenty of work to do to keep me out of trouble” or “This job provides me with a great opportunity to challenge my skills for organization and productivity”. Well+Good shares…“The old “fake it ‘til you make it” tactic definitely applies here: Research shows it really does help to feign happiness and positivity, even if you feel like things are falling apart. One recent study showed that those who were instructed to smile during a stressful task had a lower heart rate and reported more positive emotions than those who didn’t, while another proved optimistic thinkers have lower cortisol levels than pessimists.” Focusing on mindfulness can help too. When feeling the stress, stop and take a few deep breaths before you start to get into a busy contest with colleagues. These breaths makes a huge difference in your body’s response to the stress that you’re experiencing. You may very well be in over your head but that doesn’t mean you have to make it part of your everyday conversations. Start growing your WOW’s by looking at things that you actually have control over and do something about those. Stop lamenting about all the things you don’t have control over. It’s not necessarily an easy fix but it’s one that’s well worth the time and effort for your body and mind. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
So it’s the holidays and we’re all supposed to be feeling grateful. Music is playing, decorations abound…it’s like you’re living in a sappy Hallmark movie…or is it? What if you really feel tired, overwhelmed, frustrated or jealous? What if the posts on your friends’ social media walls aren’t bringing you joy? What if all you want to do is complain? Relax. It’s okay. You do you. Unless…what you really want is to feel more energy, less overwhelmed and happy with what you have. If you’d like to make that choice, read on. Did you know that according to Robert Emmons and other positive psychology researchers, having a regular gratitude practice actually:
It’s simply a choice to be grateful. Yes, it takes intention and it’s a decision you can make right now. Stop and think about something you are thankful for. Yeah! You did it! Still feeling like you are faking it? Instead of thinking “When I’m happy, then I’ll be grateful” or “When I’m not working so hard, I’ll be grateful” flip it around. Try these on for size: “When I’m grateful, then I’ll feel happy.” “When I’m grateful, things at work won’t feel quite so bad.” Some of you are rolling your eyes. It’s okay. You can go back to your high stress, very busy life any time you want. You see it really is a choice. Not the external circumstances – some of those are tough to change – but the internal response is all yours. You’ve got the power to be grateful right now and every day moving forward. Create a habit of gratitude and you’ll literally become a magnet for things to be thankful for. Still doubtful? That’s okay. Try it a little bit at a time. Soon, you won’t remember what it felt like to complain all the time. You won’t remember why you let the little things get to you. You won’t remember the crabby old you. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
I’ve been listening to the podcast, “How I Built This” with host Guy Raz, which shares interesting stories of entrepreneurs who started their own businesses. Some of the recent episodes include the founders of JetBlue, Eileen Fisher Clothing and Compaq Computers. As an entrepreneur, I’m inspired by the creativity and resilience these business leaders demonstrated in starting their enterprises in spite of small and large hurdles. As the title of the podcast shares, the stories are about building and growth. This got me thinking about how these ideas relate to you – the leaders and individuals working in healthcare today. What are you building? What stories would you share if you were the podcast guest? Leaders and employees in healthcare fall into the category of a Builder or a Buster based on day-to-day performance on the job. The Performance Triangle demonstrates 3 key drivers of workplace behavior: Ability, Opportunity and Motivation. Here’s What Builders Do in Each Category… When it comes to Motivation, Builders are:
Don’t Be a Buster A Buster is someone who does the opposite of the behaviors shown above. Busters are disengaged and come to work and tear down others. They suck the energy out of meetings and customer encounters. They are great at pointing fingers and laying blame. Most folks don’t self-identify as Busters; however, they demonstrate the behaviors that would define them as just that. For today, think about how you would identify yourself. Builder or Buster? Engaged or Disengaged? Satisfied or Dissatisfied? Today’s challenge is to look at one part of the Performance Triangle and figure out how to build your capacity in that area. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
As humans, we need to connect. This is a critical part of the leader’s role in engaging employees. But the news is bleak when it comes to connecting…here are a just few of the findings from a survey which Cigna conducted of 20K+ U.S. adults:
What are you doing in your role to promote positive connections? When I talk to leaders about Creating Connections, I hear about two types:
Chance Connections Chance Connections are those that are reactive in one way or another. Having an Open-Door Policy is an example. It’s good but doesn’t set a very high bar. Have you ever heard of an organization with a “Closed Door Policy”? Here’s what usually happens…you open your door and sit and wait (and mostly hope that no one stops by so that you can get your “real work” done uninterrupted – haha). It’s important to be accessible. So, keep your door open and understand that you are leaving the connection to chance. The second type of Chance Connection is rounding. In this case, you are the interruption to the staff member. Staff are in the middle of their “real work” and you’re stopping by might be a welcome break or an annoying inconvenience. Don’t get me wrong, rounding is very important because not only do you make connections, you also get a visual of how things are going. Keep rounding with staff, just know that you are still leaving the connection to chance. Conscious Connections The most powerful kind of connection is a Conscious Connection – where both you and the team member are proactive and prepared. This happens in a One-on-One (1:1) Meeting (either virtually or in-person). One question I routinely ask leaders in my client needs assessment is “What do you know you should be doing related to engagement and aren’t and why? I’ve asked this question to thousands of leaders and the number one thing they aren’t doing is meeting one-on-one with team members. Many leaders struggle with making Conscious Connections. The number one reason why they aren’t doing it is that “there isn’t enough time.” In follow up conversations, I hear the second reason it’s not happening is that there’s a perception that it’s not worth the time. Of course, these two challenges go hand in hand. If you don’t think something is worth your time, then you aren’t going to make time for it. Make Time for Meetings Here’s one thing I know. Your actions and behaviors reflect your beliefs and mindsets. If you believe that meeting 1:1 with your direct reports is important – you will make the time. Try these ideas:
Make the Meetings Worthwhile What makes a 1:1 meeting so powerful is that both you and your direct report are prepared for the conversation. It’s a Conscious Connection. That alone adds to the value. Try these ideas:
Now is the time to create Conscious Connections and positively impact engagement – yours and your team’s. Enjoy! Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
More than 800 healthcare leaders responded to the Voices of Healthcare Management™ survey I recently completed, and an interesting insight they shared is that that one of the top 3 most challenging engagement behaviors for leaders is taking time for reflection and self-awareness. I’m not surprised, are you? If you pulled out your calendar right now, where would “reflection” show up? I’m guessing nowhere. What if your boss walked into your office and you were sitting behind your desk with a faraway look on your face thinking? You might be embarrassed and thought of as "wasting time." That couldn’t be farther from the truth. We know that self-awareness and self-management are two key elements of emotional intelligence. We also know that emotional intelligence is a critical skill for getting along in the world. The great news is that these two skills can be learned and practiced through reflection. According to Barbara Mackoff, in Nurse Manager Engagement: Strategies for Excellence and Commitment, engaged (nurse) managers leverage lessons from experience. They look for clues about themselves and others in the workplace and observe the effect of their own behavior on others. It makes sense that these behaviors would apply to everyone in an organization, regardless of your role. Here are 3 ideas to jumpstart your reflection abilities: 1. When something good happens and you are feeling satisfied, energized and productive (AKA engaged), stop and reflect on how your behaviors contributed to the positive results. 2. You know what’s coming next. When you experience results that you aren’t happy with, stop and reflect on how your behaviors contributed to the negative outcome. 3. Build reflection into your day with intention. Before you dive in to start your next project, stop and reflect on your progress to date. Take 2 minutes to sit quietly and think about what you want to accomplish and how things are going so far. Taking time for reflection and self-awareness allows you to find joy in your own work and to connect to others in a more positive way. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Vicki Hess
Have you ever noticed how feelings of joy might be fleeting, but anger seems to stick around? I’m working on a new keynote about resilience called Journey to Joy™ and this process has me thinking a lot about joy and anger. We have all experienced anger at work. According to Science of People, “psychologists have discovered that there are three causes of anger:
It’s easy to see how healthcare professionals in all roles can experience these causes at work…especially #1. When you’re angry your body releases stress hormones that lead to a fight or flight response. Over time, if anger persists, these hormones can lead to headaches, increased blood pressure and more. The external ramifications of anger may also include damaged relationships and work-related performance issues. When you’re cool, calm and collected, this all makes sense but in the heat of the moment, when your hot buttons are being pushed, it can be difficult. What most folks want to know is what to do with the anger. It’s not good to ignore those feelings. Repressing the anger can lead to a bigger burst down the road and that’s not healthy either. My suggestion is to SHIFT from anger to joy. Some of you have heard me speak or read my work about SHIFTing your POWs to WOWs and these steps may look familiar. Here are 5 steps to shrink the anger and choose joy:
Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! |
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