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By John O'Leary. This was originally posted on JohnOLearyInspires.com. When John O'Leary was 9 years old, he suffered burns over 100% of his body and was expected to die. He is now an inspirational speaker and bestselling author, teaching more than 50,000 people around the world each year how to live inspired. John's first book, ON FIRE: The 7 Choices to Ignite a Radically Inspired Life was published March 15, 2016. John is a contributing writer for Huff Post and Parade.com. John is a proud husband and father of four and resides in St. Louis, MO. Order John’s book today anywhere books are sold.
Marriage is hard. (Don’t worry, I’ll be making my point quickly before I get into trouble with my bride.) Parenting is also hard. Being intentional as an adult child, good friend, courteous neighbor, helpful coworker, visionary leader or humble servant are all challenging roles. In fact, every worthy relationship is certain to endure periods of tension. Even relationships with those we care for deeply can erode because of busyness, emotional or physical distance, simple misunderstandings, repeated let-downs, accidental slights or perceived deliberate affronts. Over time, the gulf can appear too great to bridge. As a speaker, I inspire individuals within business units to come together, work through differences, clarify roles, reconnect as a team and move forward. I share five questions to begin the journey forward, together. These questions, and their honest answers, permit the rebirth of collaboration within previously hostile business units, families, friendships and communities. 5 Questions to Reconnect at Work and at Home 1. If this meeting was extremely successful, what would I want to achieve? Start with the end in mind. You’re investing time, taking a risk and ready to move past the status quo to something better. Paint a clear picture of what ‘better’ looks like. Clearly state what you want to get from the meeting and listen as others share their vision of success, too. Relationships seldom thrive if they’re based on one side winning and another side losing. Aim for the win-win. 2. When things were better: What were we doing and how did we interact and feel? Often when we try to reconcile differences, there’s a lot of blame-shifting: “I hate when you…. You never…. I’m the only one that…” Statements like these don’t advance the conversation. Instead, celebrate what success once looked like. How did the team operate? What did you talk about on those dates? How did it feel when the tension wasn’t in the room? What were you able to accomplish? Being reminded of how it once was can provide hope of what it can become again. 3. What changed that lead us to where we are today? Halfway through, you get the chance to finger point and let them have it! My encouragement, though, is to begin by pointing first to the mirror. Own your piece of it. Admit your missteps that lead to the distance before telling someone else about theirs. You might acknowledge “I started working too much… I didn’t get the project submitted on time… I lost track of what we were trying to do…” After conceding where you fell short, it’s safe to call out areas where they might improve, too. The objective isn’t to prove who is right, but to acknowledge honestly where it went wrong. 4. What could a super healthy, engaged relationship achieve? What am I willing to do to bring about the desired change? Sharing the vision of the long-term success of the project, team or family is essential in enduring adversity that creeps into every relationship. Knowing the why – the big goal – provides energy to strive forward. To get where we want to go, we must own our piece of what went wrong, what can go right in the future, and what we’ll commit to going forward. Own not only the grandiose vision of possibility, but your role in living into it. 5. In order to bring about the desired change so we can move forward, together, I am asking that you… : Many of the heartaches we deal with in relationship are from lack of clear expectations and communication. We thought they meant one thing, but they actually meant something else; they thought we said something, and we intended something else. State clearly what you hope for, what you expect and why it matters. While unmet expectations are the genesis of most conflict, clearly articulated expectations are the foundation of great achievement. My friend, if you ever read the paper, watch the news, or check your social media feed, you’re hit with bad news. The problems we face individually and collectively are increasing in complexity, frequency and intensity. It also seems the willingness of various factions to come together for open, honest dialogue is close to nonexistent. Every solution to every problem is simple and it’s already in the room. From complex issues facing nations to intimate challenges facing relationships, I’m convinced that the questions above and the honest answers to them can stoke reconciliation within distant family members, reunion with old friends, and rebirth in divided communities. We just have to be willing to ask (and answer) them. This is your day. Live Inspired. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success!
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By Zonya Foco
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Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Colette Carlson
My smartphone surprised me. It was about 7:00 p.m., and I had just gotten back to my hotel room after a long day at an out-of-town speaking engagement. I was startled by a flash from my phone, with the message, “Good evening, Colette” and photo of what looked like a row of brightly lit New Orleans French Quarter shops at dusk. I instantly had this warm and comforted feeling…then I chuckled at my response to a random phone app (which I don’t even recall downloading, by the way). Nonetheless, it got me thinking about this idea of merging technology – particularly artificial intelligence (AI) – with human emotion. Without getting into a deep discussion of the possible consequences of “virtual emotional support,” including Stephen Hawking’s view that full development of AI would put an end to mankind, I see evidence of this level of technology leading instead to increased need for “soft skills”—the capacity for creativity, empathy, compassion, and paying attention to others. But could AI be fine-tuned to master these connecting skills? Consider the following: Human Intangibles Can’t be Programmed – Recently, I read an article that talked about Apple Corporation’s hopes to broaden Siri’s IPhone functions to include mental health advice—sort of a quasi-therapist. To that end, this tech giant is reportedly looking for a software engineer with additional “peer counseling or psychology background.” The role is titled ‘Siri Software Engineer, Health and Wellness.’ Interestingly, the article also noted that Apple may be struggling to fill the position, which has been open since April, since there are not many people proficient in both coding and counseling. I think the lack of candidates is far more likely related to the inadequacy of “pat answers” to help people through complex emotional issues. Who else but another person could possibly understand human feelings, so often irrational and contradictory? Connection is a Priority in Health Care – As reported by Bertalan Mesko, MD PhD in his article, “The Future is About Empathy, Not Coding,” the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics predicts that while jobs for doctors and surgeons will rise by 14% between 2014 and 2024, the top three direct-care jobs – personal-care aide, home-health aide, and nursing assistant – are expected to grow by 26%. Healthcare is a growing area, especially now with the elderly population on the rise, and human connection skills are among the most important qualifications for working in this field. As Mesko states, applying technology to treating human beings has definite limitations. Although AI will perform diagnostic tasks, and robots might be able to do certain surgeries, can an electronic device talk to a patient with empathy about the risks and consequences of an operation? Natural Disaster & Trauma – Recently, I worked with a company that delivers technology and solutions for contact centers handling a high volume of incoming calls, including large moving, storage, and mortgage companies that have been recently inundated with calls relating to hurricane damage. Although AI can answer basic questions, these companies recognize the need for call center employees to be able to effectively communicate with victims about specific concerns. They need representatives who are skilled in relating to people who have suffered major, devastating losses after this type of large-scale disaster. It seems safe to say that AI can only be as effective as its ability to operate within people’s standards of practicality and emotion. By working on our ability to connect to others, we maximize our unique human strengths—the emotional qualities that make us irreplaceable. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Karyn Buxman. This was originally published on Karyn's blog.
As I chatted with Brett in his office, several of his staff walked by the door and giggled. One of the young women leaned into the doorway and said, “Don’t be late for your appointment!” and winked. He waved at her and laughed, saying, “Don’t worry. I’m not backing out!” He looked at me and laughed. “It’s not what you’re probably thinking! A couple months ago I told my staff that if they could go an entire month without an injury or a safety violation, I’d shave my head! At first I was just joking around. I said it more out of exasperation than seriousness. But the staff pounced on the idea. Before you know it, for the first time in ages, they hit the target. As soon as that happened, they came to me and set up a date to ceremoniously shave my head! Between you and me, my first thought was ‘Oh crap! I’m going to look like a dork!’ “But then I realized I’d achieved two things: Most importantly, we met an important safety target. That’s huge. But the thing that I hadn’t expected was that this silly challenge brought my staff together in a way that I never could’ve anticipated. I may look like a goofball, but you know what? I’ll definitely do it again—once my hair grows back!” As leaders, we’re not looking for opportunities to look foolish in front of those we lead. But as Einstein once said, to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results is insanity. We’re often called to step out of our comfort zone to achieve our desired outcomes. When Brett took a risk and allowed himself to appear silly, he achieved his goal—and more! As a leader, it’s important to be able to stretch out of your comfort zone to achieve different and better results. Humor is a safe way to do just that. And the more you do it, the easier it becomes. So stretch beyond your comfort zone today and try something a little silly. Maybe a little air guitar in the cafeteria? A rendition of Monty Python’s Silly Walk across the parking lot? Former President George Bush Sr. wears goofy socks. Sam Walton was willing to dance down Wall Street in a hula skirt. He and his company laughed all the way to the bank. Leadership involves calculated risks. Humor, when practiced without purpose, can involve a degree of risk. But when used strategically, humor will help you achieve incredible results. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Ron Culberson. With a master’s degree in social work, Ron Culberson spent the first part of his career working in a large hospice organization as a clinical social worker, middle manager, and senior leader. As a speaker, humorist, and author of "Do it Well. Make it Fun.The Key to Success in Life, Death, and Almost Everything in Between", he has delivered more than 1,000 presentations to associations, government agencies, non-profit organizations, and corporations. His mission is to change the workplace culture so that organizations are more productive and staff are more content. He was also the 2012-2013 president of the National Speakers Association and is a recognized expert on the benefits of humor and laughter.
My family went out to dinner one night and the service was really slow. After a long wait, our server brought the burgers and fries but did not bring any ketchup. When we asked for some ketchup, the server said she would bring it right out. Ten minutes later we still didn’t have any ketchup. I don’t know how long it takes you to eat but for me, ten minutes is about eight minutes longer than I need. I eat fast. Coincidentally, I also walk fast, talk fast, hurry fast…well…you get the picture. In addition to not getting any ketchup, the food was lukewarm. So the longer we waited, the less appetizing our already-cold-sans-ketchup meal became. When the server finally returned, my wife said, “Unfortunately, our food was not hot when it arrived. And we didn’t get the ketchup.” The server said, “Well, we’re doing the best we can. It’s very busy.” And then she walked away. Do you ever have those moments in life when you want to stand up and deliver a ten-minute soliloquy on good customer service? No? Well, maybe that’s just me and my professional speaker world. And for the record, I held my tongue and did not say, “Well, you’re way behind and you really need to ketch-up.” But here’s the thing. The main concern I had with our server’s behavior was not so much what she did but how she did it. Oh sure, we were frustrated by the slow service and the lack of ketchup but her response compounded the problem significantly. The better approach would have been to apologize, to offer to replace our cold food, and to take responsibility for not remembering the dang ketchup. But when the server discounted our problem and blamed it on being busy, the implication was that her busy-ness took precedent over our need for a quality dining experience. The how of what we do is not always obvious to us because we’re too busy doing the what. Our days are so cram packed, we typically just want to get stuff done rather than pay attention to how we’re getting stuff done. I suggest, though, that the how is just as important as the what, and when we consider both, we’re much more effective in everything we do. Let’s walk through a few ideas for how we can apply this concept... Take Responsibility. First and foremost, we must take responsibility for our role in any situation or relationship. When we blame other people or the system, we are not operating with integrity and we’ll be less successful in our endeavors. In our restaurant experience, the server blamed the situation for our lack of satisfaction. By saying that they were doing the best that they could, she made it sound as if they were unable to do any better. However, if she had owned the situation, we might have become her ally and tried to make things easier on her. And even if she couldn’t control the chaos of the evening, by simply acknowledging what she was doing to improve things for us, she would have added a bit of integrity to her efforts. Empathy. One of the best techniques for successfully maneuvering through this world is to show empathy for others. When we understand where others are coming from, we put ourselves in their shoes. And when we do that, we’re much more likely to approach them and the situation with more compassion. For instance, if our server had more empathy for us, she would have realized that we were not happy with the slow service or the fact that our food was cold. But instead of empathizing with us, she was more concerned with herself and responded in a self-protective manner by defending her own behavior. Word Choice. Lastly, once we take responsibility and have empathy for others, our choice of words has a big impact on how we interact with others. In my experience, I have seen a number of leaders undermine their good ideas because they didn’t use the right words to share those ideas. And when we use the wrong words, we can sometimes create more problems than we solve. Imagine how we would have felt if our server had said this: “I’m so sorry that your food is cold. I can understand your frustration. This is not the kind of experience we want our customers to have. I want to fix this for you so that you leave our restaurant happy and satisfied.” I think we would have reacted differently. But somewhere along the way, she was probably told that she should not admit that there is a problem or else people will demand a refund or make a complaint to the manager. Ironically when service personnel acknowledge the problem, most customers are more understanding. I truly do empathize with restaurant staff and anyone else who has to deal with the public. It’s a tough job and people are not always polite. However, if we just understand the value of taking responsibility for the situation, showing a little empathy, and then using the right words, we will be more successful in how we handle most challenges. So, the rule to remember is this: Pay as much attention to the how as you do to the what. Oh, and BYOK (Bring Your Own Ketchup). Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Laurie Guest
It’s so important to factor in body language when it comes to making a first impression. Before you open your mouth to speak, you have already delivered a message. The words you speak, intertwined with your body language, communicate whether you are approachable or unapproachable, and so much more. My experience in learning body language started when I was about 19 years old and working in health care. I had a habit of folding my arms over my mid-section and leaning against door jams or registration desks with a hip out (and a little bit of attitude out, too). I was standing like that one day when the doctor I was working with walked up, pointed to my folded arms, and said, “Knock off the attitude!” I clearly remember responding, with complete attitude all over my face, “What attitude?” She handed me a book on body language and told me it was mandatory reading, complete with a book report. I rolled my eyes and made that sound in my throat that says, “This is stupid.” She noted, “You will find those behaviors on page fifty-two.” I took the book home against my will, and I can say today that it’s one of the five books that changed the course of my life. After studying my own body language, I learned how to change several key things. First, I adopted an open stance when engaging with people. That means arms not crossed, but rather down at my sides or loosely bent at elbows with fingertips touching. Instead of leaning on things, which causes one hip to protrude out giving a cue of boredom, I trained myself to stand up straight with both feet firmly planted and weight equally distributed. Most importantly, however, I concentrated on eye contact and smiling. Maintaining eye contact doesn’t mean staring at a person to the point of awkwardness! It means looking right at the person you are speaking to rather than over his/her shoulder or down at your feet. A smile doesn’t have to be so big your cheeks hurt. A slight upturn of the corners so that your mouth leaves the neutral position is enough. (Interestingly, a mouth in neutral position actually looks like attitude. A slight upturn makes all the difference.) Once I made these subtle changes, I noticed my ability to connect with our customers and with my coworkers improved. Now as a speaker meeting hundreds of new people each month, I am amazed at how strong the signal can be from those who have not studied the consequences of bad body language. Learning how to improve body language will impact your customer service. Concentrate on eye contact and smiling, the two keys to positive body language. Body language influences a customer’s perspective of your business from the first moment of contact. Keeping your posture open and welcoming, rather than bored or busy, makes an impact. It’s also important to remember that not only should you think about the body language you share, but you also need to read the body language of the customer. For example, in retail, body language tells you to back off and give the customer some space. Take notice of this and follow up with the right words like, “Hey, let me give you some time to browse. Just wave at me if I can be of help.” What about the opposite of that: the customer that needs our attention immediately? Think about the body language of restaurant guests when they’re in a rush. Picking up on that and leaving the check right after the plate is placed would be a great way to anticipate their needs. Say something like, “I thought you might be in a hurry, so here’s your check right away. I’ll swing back in a little bit to see if you’d like anything else.” A happy diner will likely be a repeat diner! Being a pro at body language comes with being aware and paying attention to the tells. Small movements and gestures give you clues into what a person thinks. Regardless of your business, apply the principles of non-verbal cues. It will be an impactful contributing factor to your overall success. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By Steve Berkowitz
Almost every chief medical officer (CMO) that I work with in my advisory program has encountered at least one situation in the hospital every year that requires a significant intervention with a member of the medical staff. Whether the precipitating event is a disruptive physician, an incompetent provider, or simply a sensitive political situation, the leadership faces challenges as to what is the best way to provide a fair and due process that will achieve the most effective result. Having encountered many of these incidents during my tenure as a CMO and a consultant, I have found it useful to apply the following three rules to the interventions that I have had to consider. I review these rules regularly with fellow CMOs. I have discussed these previously in publications, but with the new year coming on, it is worthwhile to revisit these three simple rules: Rule 1: Patient safety comes first. This should be self-evident, and something that is automatically assumed. We have an obligation as physicians and as health care leaders to always advocate in the best interests of our patient. When evaluating the pros and cons of any potential decision, we should always opt for the choice that offers the safest possible environment for our patients. Therefore, prior to considering any decision in these cases, I first ask myself “is the patient (or any future patients) at risk”. Patient safety is the low bar that must always be achieved. Regardless of the ultimate decision, patient safety rules! Rule 2: Always follow your bylaws and procedures-. One of the most common reasons for getting into trouble in any potential intervention is that someone did not follow the established rules. Most of us avoid reviewing the medical staff rules and regulations, and when we do look at them, they could well serve as a cure for insomnia. Having said that, we must always remember they were created for a very important purpose— and this physician intervention is specifically one of those purposes. Whoever is quarterbacking the decision process, usually the CMO, must be totally familiar with every existing rule, regulation, bylaw and precedent. The first step in the process is NOT to do a knee-jerk reaction, but rather to immediately refresh yourself with the rules. Unless you are in immediate extreme danger, and that is rarely the case, take a few moments to reacquaint yourself with those rules and bylaws up front. This review time is well spent. Also, in every step of the process, make sure that each participant, including the physician being reviewed, has a copy of those rules and understands them fully. If the situation ever goes to some form of legal review or litigation down the road, one of the first things that will be looked at is “did you follow all of your own rules and regulations?”. Do not get bit by that one. Not following the rules opens you up to all sorts of problems, all of which distract from the original offense that you are trying to manage. But rather than being negative, look at the converse: the rules are your friend during this process. Following the rules is your best protection from an adverse procedural event or adverse outcome, and your best pathway to get a reasonable remedy. Never assume you know the rules; always check them out and be sure you are comfortable with them. If there is any doubt, immediately seek legal counsel. Rule 3: Implement the least disruptive solution that ensures Rule 1. Following these rules you have first considered the patient safety aspect, and then have followed all the rules during the process. Now it is time for the remedy. What is the most appropriate action to resolve the issue? With any intervention, there is often a continuum of potential remedies. For example, for an offending physician, it may range from a simple reprimand to summary suspension—or anywhere in between. Here is where Rule 3 is so important. I always advise clients who, given a spectrum of potential responses, choose the least disruptive option that will ensure patient safety. Ensuring patient safety must trump any potential concerns for the welfare of the individual physician, or even the hospital. The sports analogy is that whether you win by 50 points or 1 point, you still win. The “win” is to maintain patient safety. Although you want to minimize the impact of the decision on the organization and on the physician, it should never sacrifice the safety of the patient. Over the years, I have found the application of these principles to be very helpful. Even though I started doing this almost 30 years ago, I feel that the three rules are still relevant. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us today to make your healthcare event a success! By Kristin Baird
Healthcare providers are busier than ever before and it’s starting to wear on many of them. What I see when I am up on the units are compassionate and caring doctors and nurses with a lot on their minds as they move from patient to patient and situation to situation. They want to deliver a great patient experience, but find the demands on their time excruciating. When I do shadow-coaching, I often hear the same concern from both doctors and nurses. They want to know how to cope with the sheer demands on their time. They want to be fully present for each patient, but have difficulty shutting off the rest of the noise in their heads including thoughts about the last patient, the pager going off in their pocket, and the list of patients still waiting for them. The reality is that the workload isn’t about to get lighter, which means providers must find ways to cope in order to keep from burning out. Mindfulness is one of the best coping mechanisms that I’ve seen. I’ve witnessed firsthand the immediate impact it has on those who practice it. he challenge is in getting started because many people don’t believe you can achieve mindfulness outside of a quiet, dark room or a mountain in Tibet. You can. It may not be to the depth achieved in a controlled environment, but it is possible. It is a learned behavior. Here is the simple mindfulness practice that I teach: Before entering a patient room, pause outside the door. Use this pause to bring your mind to the present. Touch the door frame while you take 2-3 deep cleansing breaths while saying to yourself, “I am right here, right now.” While foaming your hands, tell yourself that you are washing away distractions. This simple practice takes just a few seconds and reaps huge rewards in patient and provider satisfaction. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! By LeAnn Thieman. This was originally published on LeAnn's blog.
Many healthcare workers feel guilty for taking time off. In fact, 60 percent of employed Americans said they feel uncomfortable taking a day off work for preventive care and 86 percent would forego checkups and put work first. Some employers offer “Unsick Days” to give staff paid time off and explicit permission to take care of themselves. Half of the employees surveyed said they believe that taking time off to go to an appointment could harm their chances of getting a promotion, and 69 percent of millennials have this fear. Counter intuitively, 38 percent of American workers said they think their colleagues would be inconvenienced, annoyed, or stressed if they missed work for a preventive care appointment, although 62 percent said they would be supportive or happy if one of their co-workers did so. One estimates the cost of “presenteeism,” or the practice of sick employees showing up to work and being less productive, at $160 billion per year, more than double the estimated cost of “absenteeism,” or staying home to recuperate. Taking one day off for a preventive care appointment could reduce a person’s chances of future illnesses, and it may reduce the feeling of “burning out” (especially in the nursing field). When was your last physical exam? Turn off your computer and pick up the phone. Make an appointment today. You can care for yourself AND care for others. Looking for your next healthcare speaker? Get in touch with us at the Capitol City Speakers Bureau today to make your healthcare event a success! |
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